Parent-Teacher Cooperation

I attended a staff meeting today after school that was aimed at getting us ready for upcoming visits from the district. Because my school is so low in scores and high in every sort of need you could imagine, we are under great scrutiny right now - more so than other "regular" schools. The scores all across the board at the school are dismal and depressing, and the students' discouragement is exhibited in the lack of effort and the sometimes mind-boggling behaviors.

Anyway, we were told at the meeting what sorts of things we should definitely be displaying in our classrooms - things that the district big wigs (who probably never taught a class --let alone a class like they would have at my school) would want to see. Most of the requirements are common sense things to incorporate everyday, and then there are the extras that are only for the "dog and pony" effect because the higher-ups think they enhance instruction. (Some of the things do, and some things don't.)

With all the many expectations for which we are held accountable, we at the school all wonder the same thing... Where is the parent accountability? ...and the parents' parents' accountability? ...and the parents' parents' parents' accountability? I think you get my point. There has obviously been an ongoing cycle of people having babies and not actually raising them, so the cycle almost never ends. If a student is never taught to focus on his education, work diligently, respect authority, and is never expected to succeed in life overall, we must face the reality of what happens later on in the life of that student. He goes on eventually to have many children of his own, and he has the same low to no standards with his offspring. If someone can't handle his own life and make something good of it, then he should not be bringing new life into this world ---unless he's planning to give that child the childhood he didn't have - one of love, protection, support (physical, mental, spiritual, etc.), and education. The very moment his efforts are shown to be lacking the aforesaid basics, then his children should be put in the care of those who will ensure the success of the children.

There is no excuse for someone's child to be reading at a second grade level in the fifth grade. Unfortunately, yes--there are bad teachers. It shouldn't be the case, just as we shouldn't have bad parents. I guess I must remind myself we don't live in the perfect world. There are circumstances where one child might have had one teacher who was not the best--maybe even two teachers, but I'm sorry-- a PARENT starts teaching his/her child practically the moment the baby's eyes open. If a parent has a teacher who isn't doing his/her job, then he/she should stand up for his child's educational rights! It ultimately falls on the parents.

There are children with mental defects, but they are not as numerous as the scores from each one of our school's children might suggest. It's the lack of essential parenting that puts children into this predicament of low scores and seemingly low ability. In reality, they are capable of so much more, but nothing is reinforced at home by the parents. Therefore, students are left to their own devices, while teachers do their best to raise the bar of expectation that was never introduced at home.

So, where are the parents? The fact is many "parents" shouldn't be parents. Please notice my distinction there. Almost anyone can be a "parent," but it takes a well-rounded, kind-hearted, hard-working, and dare I say educated human being to be a parent. I was born, raised, and still live in Pine Hills (known as "the ghetto" to most people), so I know what outside influences I'm battling each day at my neighborhood school. But even though I lived in such a place, I turned out just fine (I hope you agree--if you know me :)), so I know success can be reached. I just sometimes wonder how --when many of my students don't have the love and support (and shelter--figuratively and literally) that I had growing up. They are caught up in a cycle they cannot keep from spiraling out of control. I pray that my efforts somehow reach them and change them for the better.

I work hard and put in long hours trying to get every bit of information crammed into each student's brain in a way that works for their individual skills and interests. Oftentimes, in my particular environment, I see the fruits of my labor. There are also times when I don't. I cannot force a child to learn. At some point, it is that child's responsibility (and yes--the parents' responsibility) to ensure he/she is taking full advantage of what I offer. Why, then, do the district people not visit the parents? Are they checking to see if the parents are feeding their children, giving them encouragement, conferencing with the teacher, providing feedback on their child's progress, etc.? No. It all falls on the teachers.

Please do not read the above paragraphs and think that in some way I am trying to suggest that I should not have to answer to anyone. I fully expect and encourage others to keep all teachers in check. With such a demanding career, I knew that my life would be changed forever, and I take the good and the bad in stride. I do, however, believe that I should have the support of the community in which I teach. Give kids what they need to be successful! If you are a parent, step up to the plate! I should never hear the sad stories of students who steal snacks from the teacher because he's not fed at home. Students should not being throwing desks and chairs in an angry rage just because they were reprimanded. Getting an attitude and refusing to follow simple directions like 'follow along in your book' should not be the norm. And yet... All of those have happened. The most serious of those are not even the worst stories that I have heard from my colleagues and/or have experienced myself.

Again, when I signed up for this job, I knew what kind of school and neighborhood I was embracing. And I still fully embrace it. People have asked me, "Why don't you go to another school?" Well, the truth is this is where I am most needed. I might come home exhausted and wondering why the world is the way it is, but my passion to teach keeps me begging for more challenges the next day. I have no regrets, and I must keep trudging on and working to better myself and my students. With or without parent support, I am expected to develop miracles in the classroom. So, daily, I plant the seeds and water them until one day I see them in full bloom. I just pray that God intervenes (somehow through me --in part) in the lives of my students, so that the cycle of "parent-less" parenting crumbles and a new cycle of hope, respect, and education take priority over all despicable earthly motives and routines.